When my toddling granddaughter doesn’t get what she wants, her natural reaction (or is it a learnt behavior?) is to throw her binky to the ground and test her lungs in a manner she knows will attract attention to her satisfaction. No doubt Baby Mo will one day learn she is not at the center of the universe and her methods of attaining satisfaction will change… after all, she just turned two. But what if Baby Mo’s parents allowed, expected, and encouraged bad behavior. As an unbiased grandparent, should I fault my granddaughter or should the blame be placed upon those directly responsible for NOT teaching her right from wrong?
Thought this would be an effective transition to the core topic of the sports day: Dwight Howard’s threats and temper tantrum… then again, is this truly fair as Dwight is well beyond the chronological age of two and is a polished product of a culture known for misplacing priorities. Raising the next topic, is Dwight’s binky throwing really his fault? If not, who or what are the influencing factors?
I’ll throw out the first line… the media, fans, owners, and coaches should be receiving the finger-pointing, scrutiny, and fury. On a private note, think about what you have done to propagate bad behavior (not just in sports but in the manner and method we live) before smashing a reflection scarcely reviewed without aid of makeup, pretend, or denial. What have you done lately to promote and progress society and/or cultural advancement? I thought so.
Due to an imperfect social education buffered by fear of sudden departure, Dwight acted out in the only way he knows. Quite bluntly, WE have become his enabler. This is part of the lecture where the class gets into human nature and social conditioning but we will forego that part and go directly to the advanced chapter. Then again, being a grandparent, I know we (as in ALL of us) turn our heads or cover our eyes, defending our simplicity by blaming the consequence, not the cause.
I’ve had the pleasure to write for WONO for the past few years and watched Dwight mature into the man he is today. During this time I have taken a front row seat to witness how his growth, as a player and as a person, has become stunted and tarnished by the very people claiming to be his friends, his fans, his coaches, and his agents (go ahead and throw the media in the lot too).
This brings up the real question: Should Dwight Howard’s and Baby Mo’s binky throwing be the target of blame or are they both simply the result of misguided reinforcements? Think about it for a few minutes before denying that faint voice lurking behind your eyes. For superstars and grandbabies, the word “NO” rarely reaches their ears, mostly because culture seldom takes the chance of saying that two-letter word. It’s so much easier, don’t you think? But are we doing ourselves and the other a disservice?
For growth and an eventual championship, as a society, as parents, as fans, as media agents, and even as business owners, we all need to say no once in a while. With a message of tough love, let the binky’s fly and let progress take place in its natural course. Each time we reinforce negative behavior, a piece of our mirror cracks, ultimately shattering culture all together or, as we are bearing witness, a “Chosen One” packs up and departs to where the sun sets and ultra-cuddling defines the day.
Time has come to say no to Dwight, no to binky-throwing children, no to coaches who allow their players to control the court, and no to anyone or anything going against the principle of right. For the past seven years Orlando has acted as an enabler, cuddling athletes with bloated salaries (I’m not just talking about Dwight) and an open invitation to throw their binky or lay limp on a grocery floor without consequence.
Okay, I get what you’re thinking; laziness via acceptance and social complacency is so much easier. Besides, how can one person or single act change the world? History will tell you, one act cannot, but multiple single acts from multiple single causes can. Or for the vast majority, we can live today as we did yesterday, rationalizing and blaming the consequence until the end of time and doing nothing about the cause. In the end, each one of us can refuse to look into that mirror. I say no to numbness! Each one of us each day should seek deeply into the reflection and realize the person looking back has the power to craft without fearing the creation.
Look into the mirror; examine who you are and how your action (or inaction) enables bad behavior. Then look at Dwight and see the situation as it really is and not how we comfortably want rationalize it to be.
No doubt Dwight could have handled the business aspect of his life a bit differently but if one has never been taught, should that person be blamed and held accountable? His reaction to blaming the Orlando Magic coaches and owners to not listening to him is a symptom of being immature; really that’s about it.
For so many reasons, the way we are processing his trade request and childish knee-jerk manner of resolving conflict is taking precedence over the real issue. You guessed it, WE bottle-fed, snuggled, permitted, and exposed this to be acceptable behavior.
Dwight Howard is the consequence, not the cause.
As for my little angel Baby Mo, I have a feeling this grandfather will allow her to do anything she wants. Don’t’ worry though, to better prepare myself in this hypocritical stance, I plan on covering all mirrors.
Next time you enable anyone (Dwight included) by supporting binky throwing, think twice about the cause and the consequence… I believe you may be surprised.
See you at the game,
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