Tag Archives: inner confidence

Terminated Illegally (8)? Commitment to Persevere

Without seeing who you can be tomorrow,
you will never be more than who you are today.

It’s been a rough few weeks for David as he is still coping with the emotional and psychological trauma inflicted upon him last month. I’ve reached out several times to him over the past week but found only echoed silence. Fortunately he was able to pull up his bootstrap and continue highlighting a journey many have traveled.

Before David discussed additional elements leading up to the date of his firing, we took a few moments to examine his mental state of mind and a few techniques proven to strengthen self-confidence and motivation.

David: “Like I said, I just don’t get it. I worked hard, gained respect of my peers and those being mentored, and still it wasn’t good enough. I feel like a failure.”

Danny: “Losing your job will dent esteem and motivation; that’s no secret. But there are things one can do to get out of that temporary funk. For instance, what do you think about before you go to bed and when you first wake up?”

David: “What do you mean before I go to sleep? I think about how rotten it was being fired and how wrong Chity College was in so many ways. I think about this going to bed and it remains to burn my mind’s sunrise. And when I wake up, I just want to lay there, to not even get up and try. Keep thinking about ‘once a failure, always a failure.’”

Danny: “David, you have the power to control confidence and motivation. One technique proven to be effective is before going to bed one should think about a positive event completed during the day. It could be something simple like making a great meal or working on a project or being patient in heavy traffic (without raising blood pressure). Research is clear, what one thinks about as they go to bed impacts the quality of sleep and morning attitude.”

David: “You’re saying think positive thoughts and the world will be a better place? Sounds like a load of crap to me.”

Danny: “Not saying that at all. I am challenging you to think of something positive completed during the day each evening. And when you wake up, make a commitment to yourself that the day is going to be a good day, that you are in control, or that you will succeed. These commitments you make are often referred to as affirmations and can be quite powerful. Rather than dwelling on a hurtful past, center your concentration on a positive future.”

David: “Telling myself does not make it real. What’s the purpose?”

Danny: “True enough, but in order to change, to become more confident, and to ignite motivation, there must be a goal. Affirmations are the first steps to change from being a victim to being the champion you are meant to be. From affirmations, picture in your mind the day how you will feel. Begin with small and easily attainable goals, we’ll work our way into more challenging ones soon.”

David: “Fair enough, I’ll try this commitment thing. I’ll think about a positive before I go to bed, even think about a goal I want to complete once awake. And this affirmation thing, will give it a try.”

Danny: “To be clear, you are not going to dwell on the negatives, only on the positives. You will make positive affirmations when you wake up. I will ask you to write your daily affirmations in a journal as well. By writing affirmations on paper, the breath of life enters their soul.”

David: “Whatever.”

The power of personal commitments and affirmations can be significant and life-changing. As with David, I suggest each reader develop their own affirmations.

To share a bit about myself, my morning affirmation over the years has been (and continues to be): “I am the master of my universe, and I am the power.” Yeah, a bit corny and he-man cartoonish but it helps me recognize that if I want things to change, it must first come from within me; no one else.

I encourage you to share your affirmations over the week by sending them in through the comment page or directly to me. Next time we’ll go one step further with David by taking affirmations into the visualization stage.

As promised in previous submissions, we will detail the cognitive dissonance David had been experiencing over the past 18 months by highlighting external pressures and value-marginalizing techniques forced by Bertha. But first we need to get David back on the right track before the rabbit hole engulfs his confidence and motivation. For those in similar situations, no doubt you understand the reason for the detour.

If you have any questions or would like to add to the journey, contact me directly at dhuffman@educationcareerservices.com to see how ECS can help you. Be sure and have your peers join in on the conversation and adventure… they may thank you one very difficult day.

Danny Huffman, MA, CEIP, CPRW, CPCC
Education Career Services: www.edu-cs.com
Blog site: https://careerbreakout.wordpress.com
West Orlando News Online, Event and Career Columnist: http://westorlandonews.com

Career Vision Quest: In the door perspective

The wait is over. Your brain prepared plans and reactions for being accepted and rejected.
Sept 2012 yard 022
They called you back, you got the job. However much time passed, it seemed like forever. You fought to keep them equal, trying not to expect too much or fear the worst. No matter how your exterior appeared, you were stressed.

The fate of the next phase of your life was in the hands of a stranger – stress is only natural. But now, you have a job. Maybe even the job, maybe your lifelong career. Now you begin a journey down a new path, and you can most likely expect a mixture of feelings and reactions as the proverbial rubber hits the not-as-proverbial road. Your task will be to keep the following in perspective:

Relief

Breathing easy is quite welcome at the finish line of a job/career search. You have either successfully reached the goal you have been actively pursuing for the bulk of your life, or you are at a means to an end. Either way, you have taken a positive and productive step, and it is important to celebrate this victory. Building inner confidence, security, and peace can guide you through the stages of reality that follow.

Overwhelmed

Maybe the first day was easy but tedious, with little more than paperwork and introductions. Sometime in the first week, though, your work load most likely begins to flow a little heavier. As your peers and superiors begin to trust you more, your responsibility will grow, and you may find yourself struggling. You may even start to wonder why you wanted this job in the first place. If you find yourself thinking this way, it is important to remember the victory you celebrated when you were hired. Recognize that there will be challenges, and learn to see each challenge as an opportunity to grow and not as a setback to your success.

Culture Shock

You may find that your new job is next to nothing you expected it to be. Even if you studied the subject for years, preparing for a career in the field, learning the practical realities of a career in action can be startling. Maybe the expectations are higher than you think, or maybe they’re lower. There are a hundred ways life can look different behind the curtains when you hold something in high esteem for a time. What is important is to gauge your preconceptions about this job carefully. Try to combine them with all you’re learning now, and find a middle ground that helps you function as you grow into your position.

Perspective is everything, don’t forget that. Your perspective will get you places your expectations cannot. When your expectations fail, your perspective can turn everything around. By learning from the past, seeing things from other points of view, and staying optimistic about your future, you become adaptable to any situation.

Start small, and never stop. Congratulate yourself daily on a job well done. Repeat your new title to yourself, assigning it value and pride. Remind yourself where you came from and where you’re going, and above all, revel in every success.

And one more thing: Congratulations!

Interested in developing proven career success techniques or in securing cutting-edge career focused material, including interview best practice techniques or how to write effective resume/cover letters? Visit www.edu-cs.com for a complete listing of available support. You may also contact us directly: dhuffman@edu-cs.com to see how we can help you.

Rikki Payne, Career Consultant, Editor, and Writer
Education Career Services, www.edu-cs.com
Follow us on Twitter #dannyatecs
Bloge: https://careerbreakout.wordpress.com
Education Career Services: www.edu-cs.com
West Orlando News Online, Event and Career Columnist: http://westorlandonews.com